marebear
05-15-2012, 05:27 PM
For Aidan and Bronson (night night you two ;)Sir Lancelot: We were in the nick of time. You were in great peril.Sir Galahad: I don't think I was.Sir Lancelot: Yes, you were. You were in terrible peril.Sir Galahad: Look, let me go back in there and face the peril.Sir Lancelot: No, it's too perilous.Sir Galahad: Look, it's my duty as a knight to sample as much peril as I can.Sir Lancelot: No, we've got to find the Holy Grail. Come on.Sir Galahad: Oh, let me have just a little bit of peril?Sir Lancelot: No. It's unhealthy.Sir Galahad: I bet you're gay.Sir Lancelot: Am not.::::::::::::::::::::::For Stricker and Bronson Knights of Camelot: [singing] We're knights of the Round Table, we dance whene'er we're able. We do routines and chorus scenes with footwork impec-cable, We dine well here in Camelot, we eat ham and jam and Spam a lot. :::::::::::::::::::::For forum fight nightKing of Swamp Castle: Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue over who killed who.::::::::::::::.:::For Thunder ChildGod: Every time I try to talk to someone it's "sorry this" and "forgive me that" and "I'm not worthy"...::::::::::::::::::::For poopenshireLarge Man with Dead Body: Who's that then?The Dead Collector: I dunno, must be a king.Large Man with Dead Body: Why?The Dead Collector: He hasn't got **** all over him.:::::::::::::::::::::A conversation with FlanKing of Swamp Castle: Guards, make sure the prince doesn't leave this room until I come and get him.Guard #1: Not to leave the room... even if you come and get him.Guard #2: [hiccups]King of Swamp Castle: No, no. *Until* I come and get him.Guard #1: Until you come and get him, we're not to enter the room.King of Swamp Castle: No, no, no. You *stay* in the room, and make sure *he* doesn't leave.Guard #1: And you'll come and get him.Guard #2: [hiccups]King of Swamp Castle: Right.Guard #1: We don't need to do anything, apart from just stop him entering the room.King of Swamp Castle: No, no. *Leaving* the room.Guard #1: Leaving the room, yes.King of Swamp Castle: All right?Guard #2: [hiccups]Guard #1: Right. Oh, if, if, if, uh, if, if, uh, if, if, if, we... oh, if... oh...King of Swamp Castle: Look, it's quite simple. You just stay here, and make sure he doesn't leave the room. All right?Guard #2: [hiccups]Guard #1: Oh, I remember, uh, can he leave the room with us?King of Swamp Castle: No, no, no, no, you just keep him in here, and make sure...Guard #1: Oh yeah, we'll keep him in here, obviously, but if he had to leave, and we were with him...King of Swamp Castle: No, just keep him in here...Guard #1: Until you, or anyone else...King of Swamp Castle: No, not anyone else. Just me.Guard #1: Just you.Guard #2: [hiccups]King of Swamp Castle: Get back.Guard #1: Get back.King of Swamp Castle: All right?Guard #1: Right, we'll stay here until you get back.King of Swamp Castle: And make sure he doesn't leave.Guard #1: What?King of Swamp Castle: Make sure he doesn't leave.Guard #1: The prince?King of Swamp Castle: Yes, make sure he doesn't leave.Guard #1: Oh, yes, of course.[Points at Guard #2]Guard #1: I thought you meant him. You know, it seemed a bit daft me I were to guard him when he's a guard.King of Swamp Castle: Is that clear?Guard #2: [hiccups]Guard #1: Oh, quite clear. No problems.King of Swamp Castle: Right.[King of Swamp Castle turns to leave the room, both guards follow him]King of Swamp Castle: Where are you going?Guard #1: We're coming with you.King of Swamp Castle: No, no, no. I want you to stay here and make sure *he* doesn't leave.:::::::::::::::::::For War priest with editingKing Arthur: Go and tell your master that we have been charged by God with a sacred quest. If he will give us food and shelter for the night, he can join us in our quest for the Holy Golden ArmyFrench Soldier: Well, I'll ask him, but I don't think he will be very keen. Uh, he's already got one, you see.King Arthur: What?Sir Galahad: He said they've already got one!King Arthur: Are you sure he's got one?French Soldier: Oh yes, it's very nice!